no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
