Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
vagina is talking i cant
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
