I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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