Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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