dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
accomplished twins. life is a go
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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