More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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