butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
