Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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