I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Randomize
