i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
