I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
