It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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