ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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