It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
