The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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