She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
