I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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