sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
