So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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