I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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