in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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