at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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