i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
