I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
