just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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