I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
