absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
