i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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