Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
