Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
