that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
