somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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