No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
