So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
