turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
