Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
