The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
