There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
