I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
