chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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