I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
