I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
