just tell him i said nine months
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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