So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
