They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
