Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
