is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
that's an acceptable place to lick
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
We left the knife in your bed.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
