Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
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