Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
