There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
