singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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